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What should I do as a local woman got hit by an American guy? - Answers for Hanoi

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What should I do as a local woman got hit by an American guy?
ngochanhan posted September 20th, 2017 at 4:19 pm to Help!.
Viewed 537 times. Answered 9 times.

Hello,
I have to make it here to hear your point of view on this terrible thing. You might question why. Long story but the main reason was I wasn't interested and told him to go away. He got pissed and hit me right at the traffic light off Au Co street. I called the police then. But when the cops showed up, he pretended to apologise. Even after that he still texted me nasty messages. I blocked his number and could have let this go. But it's not fair. I mean you guys are warmly welcome to this country and do you think this is proper? That guy is even opening an English school in Hanoi. My friends told me to publish his FB and let people know about this rubbish because if he didnt feel ashamed hitting a woman in public, he would be happy to be well-known on social media as well. I will probably think about this. But I want to hear your thoughts as foreigners living and working in Vietnam. Yes, I am a local and a woman but I stand against violence and his disrespect is unacceptable.
Thank you for sharing your thoughts.

Answers (jump to newest answer)

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September 21st, 2017 at 6:23 am

Sadly if the cops can't or won't help I'd hesitate to take things into your own hands.

There is only so much you can do and it could all back fire on you.

That said it is utterly wrong to hit anyone except in self defense. It doesn't make any difference what you did or said to "provoke" him. That goes without saying or should anyway.

If you do decide to take some action online I would suggest you wait a week or two. When you have calmed down you will make better decisions.

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September 24th, 2017 at 3:15 am

Well, what about the fire could be all back to the big guy who hit a 90lb woman?
If you got hit by a psycho, what could you have done to "provoke" him?
This happened back in May and until now, that jerk is still going on with his uneducated behaviour.
Thanks for your thoughts anyway.

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September 25th, 2017 at 11:57 am

I wish I could offer more hopeful advice.

Maybe you should take some action to 'out' the guy as a violent and abusive individual. I just worry you will not accomplish much and may provoke more trouble for yourself along the way.

Whatever you do think it through and weight the possible outcomes carefully.

As a foreigner I guess he cannot realistically accuse you of defamation. I don't know the law here but it is surprising in some countries. In Korea for example you could accuse someone of something which is totally true and even prove it, but still be sued for defamation. That is my understanding of the law there anyway.

In your situation I would consult a lawyer before taking any action.

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September 25th, 2017 at 1:41 pm

Do you know him? Number, address?

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September 26th, 2017 at 7:24 am

If I tell my mom over FB that her daughter got hit by an asshole, of course she will go crazy and she will tell all of our relatives and friends. And, those relatives and friends will spread this story to others in all over Vietnam if/when they have a chance. Nobody can accuse you for sharing things with your family and friends. Plus, when I called the police, the case was recorded. The taxi driver who observed everything agreed to be the witness. So what I am sharing now is totally true.
I wanted to let this go. I do not want to waste my time. However, this guy was using my pictures which he took back in April for his business, without my consent. I messaged him to put those pics down but he responded by calling me stupid bitch, cunt, demented, etc,.
@jaytownz:Yes, the record was included his full name, passport number and information that he could be tracked out. I know he was trying to open some business in Hanoi.

I decided not to bring the case to the court after he committed to stop contacting me. But he continued to send a bunch of harassing messages and I have kept all of them for the evidence. I also went to the hospital to get a paper that shows my injury the day he hit me.

I know what I have in hands. I guess I should have stated my question as should I fight hard against this violence or just let it go and believe in karma?
Your opinion is highly appreciated.

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September 27th, 2017 at 4:59 pm

Either prosecute or let it go. If you have the evidence you say - I'm not doubting - and the police are willing to follow up I would consider that route. If you just blacken his name all over the internet it might be a mild annoyance for him, but it could easily amount to no real consequence, and it involves your name too. People later may search for your name and this could come up. It could impact a job application and all for nothing much.

I would get the advice of a lawyer. Someone who knows this area of law well. Tell them the whole truth, everything this guy could say to weaken your case or somehow make out you were to blame. Then follow the lawyer's advice. Even if you don't like the advice.



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October 3rd, 2017 at 10:01 am

Just ignore it. Avoid the person at all cost. Forgive for your sanity even IF you do not express those words to him directly. Believe in karma. Let the universe sort it out. Everything has it's time and place.

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October 3rd, 2017 at 10:05 am

One more thing, what lesson(s) can you learn from all this? If you are still mad after that, then that means that their are still more lessons that you must figure out for yourself in this situation because you did not learn them all. Then just move on.

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November 2nd, 2017 at 2:18 pm
Good Answer ngochanhan marked this as a good answer


My apologies, but a guy who hits a girl,no matter what she said to him, has lost his right to be a human being.

There are plenty ways if you seek revenge, but you might get involved and the story never ends.
Would somebody beat the shite out of him, would that help you? I doubt it.

Shit happens in this world and if i were you, I'd forget all and continue with life.

Tell him thru somebody else he's respecting ( and stronger!) that he isn't allowed to use your photo.

Then forget about him, assholes are everywhere.

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